IFS (Internal Family Systems) Therapy heals “symptoms” and provides a way to shift these symptoms through the language of “parts”. In this article I am going to speak about symptoms in general, and then about anxiety.
What are “symptoms” from an IFS perspective?
In its book “Introduction to the Internal Family Systems Model” (2001) Richard Schwartz states that what we call “thinking” is, actually, inner dialogue. This applies to simple daily activities when we decide what to eat (while a voice in ourselves tells us that we should eat something else), and also to serious mental health issues in which a part of us does not find any motivation to do or feel anything (depression), or a part cannot stop worrying (anxiety).
At times, our inner dialogue can be extremely busy and painful with a lot of parts with conflicting ideas and feelings try to get something done. One of the most complex configurations I know of is OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder).
In psychotherapy, we label “symptoms” a set of thoughts, feelings and behaviours that are generated by psychological reasons. For example, lack of sleep could be a “symptom” of stress.
In IFS, the word “symptom” simply means that something in our system generates that particular set of thoughts, feelings and behaviours that we call symptoms. In more complex cases, symptoms can be the result of parts that are at odds with each other. For example, what we call procrastination is the result of two parts of us that have different opinions and make it impossible to take a decision.
A paradigm shift - from symptom control to entering into a relationship with the symptom
Having redefined the idea of symptom, we can use new, non-pathological language to describe mental health conditions.
As soon as we see symptoms as the result of interaction of parts, we can only say that “we don’t know” what parts are at play. The way to diagnose, from and IFS perspective, is by entering the Internal System and understanding what parts are generating a particular symptom. This means that we do not need an “expert” to tell us what our symptoms mean and where they come from, but we need a expert to guide us through our inner journey to find out the roots of our symptoms.
We are used to listing a “collection of symptoms” to diagnose a certain mental health condition. In IFS, we use start with a “collection of symptoms” to find (and heal) the specific “configuration of parts” that generates the symptoms.
What does this mean?
This means that symptoms are a message sent from our system, and that, if we want to do something about them, we need to find out where they are coming from. Unfortunately, the biggest obstacle to this is our culture, which teaches us to eliminate the symptoms.
We generally deal with symptoms by either going against them through
suppression (making it go away with medications)
control (using will power to stop the symptom)
denial (carrying on with life as if it did not exist)
minimising it
Or we embrace them as an unchangeable aspect of us by
building an identity around the symptom (as if there was nothing to do about it)
losing hope that anything can change
avoiding any situation that triggers the symptom
Using IFS to unlock symptoms - example of anxiety
First of all, make a list of the anxiety symptoms you have got.
STEP 1 - Identify symptoms
You can find them pretty much on any website that talks about anxiety. They include constant worries, accelerate hearth-beat, generally high levels of fear of specific situations, etc. I don’t want to spend too long listing these “symptoms” because I invite you to consider that you might have your own symptoms and that only you can identify them clearly.
Please take your time doing step 1. If you are rushing, please slow down. Writing things down is a good way to focus and slow down. Remember to breathe
STEP 2 - notice how you are relating to these symptoms
IFS teaches us to find a new way of relating to our inner world, especially to the bits of our inner world that we don’t like.
As you went through step 1 and have identified some symptoms of your anxiety, choose one. Notice how you are relating to it. Are you disturbed by its presence? Or maybe you wished it wasn’t there… or maybe you are scared and ashamed of its presence.
Before any healing or any change in your symptom can happen, you need to deal with all your negative inner reactions towards it. The more we try to get rid of something inside of us, the more it will stick around. If you are reading this article, you have surely tried to get rid of uncomfortable things in you, but have you succeeded?
Step 2 is, by far, the most challenging one. You might want to seek professional help to support you in this
In IFS we ask all these negative reactions to “step back” so that we can get to know the symptom as if we were looking at it with fresh eyes. This step is at the core of IFS and, especially if you have had anxiety for a long time, you might have a lifetime worth of grudges against it. I certainly have experienced how some parts of me are utterly appalled by some other parts. It is the way we are, and it is OK. It is only a matter of time
STEP 3 - get to know the symptom from Self
This step is more a gift than a step. If you do steps 1 and 2 thoroughly, ask all negative reactions to step aside and they actually do so (they might refuse - and it is OK that they refuse!), then you are entering a state of consciousness that IFS called “Self”. From this state, the “symptom” will reveal why it is there, what it is trying to achieve by being there for you, and what it fears it would happen if it stopped doing what it does.
Healing the symptom becomes a spontaneous process at this point, but I must warn you that it is a difficult task to accomplish on your own. It is best to have a therapist or an IFS-trained buddy to help you with this.
Conclusion - there is hope!
I hope these steps have given you an insight into how IFS can help. Getting to know yourself and your parts is a worthwhile journey. There is no reason why you should not heal your anxiety.
If these steps are confusing or if you do not notice any improvement, please consult with an IFS trained therapist or practitioner.