The Drama Triangle is a well-known idea in the field of psychotherapy. Many situations of conflict and difficulty involve people taking these three roles: rescuer, persecutor, and victim.

In this article, I am going to make a distinction between two triangles based on the presence of either masculine of feminine energy. Please note that we hold both types of energy (masculine and feminine) regardless of the particular gender (or lack of gender) of our body.

The terms feminine and masculine are used in the sense of attitudes and behaviours, and not as anatomic reference to the body. Please keep in mind that we live in a culture of separation (mind vs body, logic vs emotions, masculine vs feminine) and that, energetically, masculine and feminine energies “feel” the same.

Geometrically, the three roles are the vertices of a triangle. Imagine there is a circle at each vertex.

The circle is as wide as that state is in the person’s life. For example, if you find yourself being in the victim state more often that in the state of rescuer, your victim circle is much wider than the rescuer circle.

Your task is to reduce these circles to make sure you can be in the centre of the triangle outside of any circle, because that is where the unknown and love can be accessed.

You need to engage in activities that reduce the time you spend in these three state and to consciously step out of them to access the energy of love.

Invoking the energy of love is what allows you to see and step out of these states.

With perseverance and patience, you will eventually make space for the energy of love in you, which looks like the image below.

Because we have both feminine and masculine energy inside of us, we can fall into the state of victim, persecutor or rescuer either when using feminine or masculine attributes.

It is therefore useful to look at how the drama triangle and the roles change based on whether we are using masculine or feminine energy. To make it very clear that we are talking about a “corrupted” version of energy, I am going to use the terms “fallen feminine” and “fallen masculine”.

When we step out of these fallen states, we step into the centre of the triangle, where we can access the divine feminine and divine masculine attributes.

The fallen feminine drama triangle

This is the realm of emotions, emotional abuse and guilt. Energetically this triangle is felt in the second chakra (emotions). I cal it fallen feminine, because these are behaviours that are based on a distorted view of reality and are away from the energy of love.

This triangle is kept together by the distortion that we can “hurt” people’s feelings without having permission form the other person. By this I mean that, even if we are rude to someone, it is that person who ultimately has power over their reaction to our rudeness. Will they feel offended and retaliate? Or maybe use judgement? Or feel victimised?

It is only with the ability to recognise their own emotions and see that they have choice, no matter what, that the triangle can be dismantled.

Fallen Feminine Victim

Description: overwhelmed by own emotions. Feels “hurt” by others’ actions. Feels offended and is defenceless. Does not take responsibility of own emotions and reactions - they are what they are and others are responsible for causing them. The feminine victim disowns own power to create an emotional reality of powerlessness and dependency

Fears: own decision making and power to deal with own emotions

Relationship to Rescuer: the victim uses their out-of-control emotions to induce guilt in the rescuer, who will modify their behaviour to make the victim “happy”

Relationship to Persecutor: the victim gives up ownership of emotions, which therefore creates the illusion that they depend on what the persecutor does or says

Love elements needed: awareness of own victim state, courage, trust in own creative power

Fallen Feminine Rescuer

Description: the feminine rescuer wears the mask of the “good” person. The one who is always on the side of the victim and that tries to understand the persecutor. The rescuer feels responsible for all of their actions and does not want to hurt anybody with their emotions. They do not express their emotions and try to do it all by themselves. They bend reality and truth to smooth others’ emotional reactions and make them “better”

Fears: Fear of trusting themselves and of finding individuality and balance in their emotions. Fear of healthy boundaries that would break the dynamic with victim and persecutor, resulting in loneliness

Relationship to victim: the rescuer feels guilty and responsible for the victim. They do a lot to help the victim, they offer emotional support and they might end up defending them emotionally. They want to make the victim feel better even if this means that the victim will not be given the chance of manage their emotions by themselves. The rescuer functions as emotional regulator for the victim

Relationship to persecutor: the rescuer claims to oppose the persecutor, while never posing a real threat. The rescuer uses morals to blame and judge the persecutor without ever facilitating real and substantial change

Love elements needed: the rescuer needs to embrace the love element of boundaries. The ability to understand their own motives when relating to others and the humbleness to step away from a position of superiority that does not empower the victim and does not stop the oppression from the persecutor

Fallen Feminine Persecutor

Description: uses emotions like anger, blame and hate openly towards the victim. Makes sure rescuer is also afraid of persecution

Fears: own vulnerabilities are the biggest fear and they are covered in anger and aggression

Relationship to victim: openly invades the victim’s emotional space through emotional abuse

Relationship to rescuer: make sure the rescuer is ineffective through threat (I can do to you what I do to the victim so you’d better not stand against me).

Love element needed: self kindness and acceptance of own vulnerability. Self forgiveness.

The fallen masculine drama triangle

This is the realm of logic, physical power and status. Energetically this triangle is felt in the third chakra (power).

This triangle is held together firmly by the distortion of power and control over physical matters: money, social status, authority. It is “fallen” masculine because power, control and logic are not used for the common good and planetary advancement, but serve to create competition, winners (a losers), richness (and poverty).

The way out of this triangle is that individuals recognise their own value, independence and freedom.

Fallen Masculine Victim

Description: slave, underpaid worker, indebted under the thumb of financial institutions, does what is told to do by employers or other sources of authority. The victim obeys. The victim remains in a position of powerlessness and needs someone else to solve their problems and offer support

Fears: the victim fears their own power of action: assertion and creation of own wealth and stability are out of reach. Does not want to take responsibility of own choices. Prefers not to have choice

Relationship to Rescuer: shows signs of distress and difficulty so that the rescuer gives physical support or provides ideas to solve problems

Relationship to Persecutor: fears loss of means of survival if disobeys persecutor or does not do as told

Love elements needed: awareness of own victim state, courage, trust in own creative power

Fallen Masculine Rescuer

Description: uses logic to live a life of conformity. All is meticulously calculated to minimise risks. Maintains status quo by doing a little bit to improve the situation, but never enough to empower the victim or generate a change of behaviour in the persecutor

Fears: fears own heart and real change potential that they can generate or facilitate. Does not want to give up the advantage of being the “good” person who supports the victim and also the “respectful” person who does reasonably as their are told by authorities. Fears of retaliation of persecutor

Relationship to victim: sees the victim as a burden and does things to support the victim; thus leaving the victim powerless and without opportunity to grow. The rescuer chooses what is logical and not uncomfortable

Relationship to persecutor: does marginally what the persecutor demands. Tries to be in good terms with the power of the persecutor because, logically, it is the best position to be in

Love elements needed: the rescuer need to embrace the love element of boundaries. The ability to understand their own motives when relating to others and the humbleness to step away from a position of superiority that does not empower the victim and does not stop the oppression from the persecutor

Fallen Masculine Persecutor

Description: user power, influence, money and other mean to impose on the victim and to intimidate rescuer

Fears: own weaknesses. They are kept secret at all costs. Behaviours are in place to attack others with same vulnerabilities (like secret gay people being homophobic and living a heterosexual life)

Relationship to victim: bullies, threatens or creates illusion that the victim has not choice

Relationship to rescuer: intimidates the rescuer

Love element needed: self kindness and acceptance of own vulnerability. Self forgiveness.

This was channeled was inspired by “Seating the Divine” (John and Joan Walker)

Written and channeled by Alessio Rizzo on 4th June 2020